Category: Sorrow

Agony

Kneeling by the couch once more,
I nod off, just as they did many years ago.
Position doesn’t matter kneeling, standing, sitting, plank…
In any position I sleep.
Watchful nights come easily to me 364 days of the year.
But on this night, the night He asks us to
Stay awake,
Watch,
And pray,
I sleep.
As dawn breaks, I wake up and I am sad.
He was alone, once again.

When He rose from prayer and went back to the disciples, He found them asleep, exhausted from sorrow.  “Why are you sleeping?” He asked them. “Get up and pray so that you will not fall into temptation.”
Luke 22:45-46

Precious Jewels of Time

We are often reminded that our time is precious and we must spend it wisely. This is very true, but we don’t often look at the flip side of the coin.  We often think only of our own time, but very carelessly toss away the precious time that others have taken to spend time with us or do something for us.  My sweet baby had her precious time very carelessly tossed aside and trampled yesterday and it really hurts, a lot.

As I think about it this morning, He has opened my eyes to an even greater sorrow. He has gently reminded me that I have done this to His other sweet children many times… oh please forgive me my sweet Lord.  He has also opened my eyes to an even greater joy.  He has reminded me that He treasures all of our jewels, especially the ones that the world casts aside.  Glory to You my sweet Lord! Thank You, thank You, thank You…

My sweet Lord, please forgive me and help me to treasure the precious jewels of time that others give to me so that I won’t be the cause of this pain to You again, and an INFINITE THANK YOU for treasuring and carefully gathering all of our jewels, especially the ones that the world casts aside and tramples.

Psalm 90:12
Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Ephesians 5:15-16
Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.

Isaiah 45:3
And I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness — secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name.

Our Brother’s Keepers

On our final day, the day that we meet our Maker and Judge, we will each mourn.

Some will mourn and be filled with fear and sorrow when they hear the words, “I never knew you, depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!”
– Matthew 7:23

The rest will mourn and be filled with shame and sorrow when they realize how many opportunities they missed to help guide and bring others home with them.

So the victory that day was turned into mourning for all the troops; for the troops heard that day, “The king is grieving for his son.”  The troops stole into the city that day as soldiers steal in who are ashamed when they flee in battle.
– Samuel 19:2-3

Our sweet Lord wants EVERYONE to come home, all of His sons and daughters, all of our brothers and sisters, let us not forget that we are our brother’s keepers!

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”
– Matthew 22:36-40

Grafted

Every sin large or small hurts those we are sinning against, but I think our sweet Jesus stands in front every time taking the brunt of the damage, accepting one more lash from the whip.

We have all whipped Him.

Romans 3:23 …for all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God…

Once we realize, accept and deeply mourn that some of the lacerations on His precious and holy body are from us, we can then thank our sweet and holy and precious Lord for accepting these lashes, because without these fresh wounds and openings we would not be able to climb inside and graft the dead twig of our life into the living root of Jesse, Jesus Christ!

Sweet Lord Jesus, please graft us to You so we might live in You and You may live and bear fruit through us!

Romans 15:12  And again, Isaiah says, “The Root of Jesse will spring up, one who will arise to rule over the nations; in him the Gentiles will hope.”

Mark 8:22-26  They came to Bethsaida, and some people brought a blind man and begged Jesus to touch him. He took the blind man by the hand and led him outside the village. When he had spit on the man’s eyes and put his hands on him, Jesus asked, “Do you see anything?”

He looked up and said, “I see people; they look like trees walking around.”

Once more Jesus put his hands on the man’s eyes. Then his eyes were opened, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly. Jesus sent him home, saying, “Don’t even go into the village.”

Double Doors

Can you see them?

Look up at just right angle and you will see high on the Hill of Calvary there is a set of double doors created just for us.  The lintel and center post is covered in the blood of our Passover Lamb, our sweet and precious Jesus.

His Cross holds these doors open for us… and through this opening He calls to us, beckoning for us to come, come in and see!

RUN my friends, run to His Cross, run through the doors while He holds them open for us!

John 14:6
Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Isaiah 45:1-4
Thus says the LORD to His anointed,
To Cyrus, whose right hand I have held—
To subdue nations before him
And loose the armor of kings,
To open before him the double doors,
So that the gates will not be shut:
‘I will go before you
And make the crooked places straight;
I will break in pieces the gates of bronze
And cut the bars of iron.
I will give you the treasures of darkness
And hidden riches of secret places,
That you may know that I, the LORD,
Who call you by your name,
Am the God of Israel.
For Jacob My servant’s sake,
And Israel My elect,
I have even called you by your name;
I have named you, though you have not known Me…

Matthew 25:1-13
“Then the Kingdom of Heaven will be like ten bridesmaids who took their lamps and went to meet the bridegroom. Five of them were foolish, and five were wise. The five who were foolish didn’t take enough olive oil for their lamps,  but the other five were wise enough to take along extra oil. When the bridegroom was delayed, they all became drowsy and fell asleep.

“At midnight they were roused by the shout, ‘Look, the bridegroom is coming! Come out and meet him!’ “All the bridesmaids got up and prepared their lamps. 8 Then the five foolish ones asked the others, ‘Please give us some of your oil because our lamps are going out.’“But the others replied, ‘We don’t have enough for all of us. Go to a shop and buy some for yourselves.’ “But while they were gone to buy oil, the bridegroom came. Then those who were ready went in with him to the marriage feast, and the door was locked. Later, when the other five bridesmaids returned, they stood outside, calling, ‘Lord! Lord! Open the door for us!’ “But he called back, ‘Believe me, I don’t know you!’

“So you, too, must keep watch! For you do not know the day or hour of my return.

Intersections

When two opposing lines, a vertical line and a horizontal line, intersect they create a cross – just like the cross our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, was crucified on.  On that ancient cross, at that intersection, heaven and earth collided, yet we forget… opposites and intersections are a part of our everyday lives and I think heaven can be found at these intersections.

My friends – seek the intersections, seek the opposites and when you find them fall to your knees in worship, prayer and gratitude as if you were before that very first intersection, the cross carrying our sweet and precious Lord, Jesus.

Jesus called out with a loud voice, “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.” When he had said this, he breathed his last.
– Luke 23:46

And Jesus said, “What do you want me to do for you?”

Sometimes we pray and pray and then pray some more, but do we know what we are asking Jesus to do for us?

I am often praying for forgiveness.  Forgive me for this, forgive me for that, forgive my sin from yesterday, forgive my sin from 15 years ago, etc.  This morning I was praying for forgiveness for something yet again, and I thought to myself or He said, “I have forgiven you, and I will forgive you again, and I will continue forgiving you as many times as you request to be forgiven, but when will you release your sin and give it to Me?”

When will I release my sin, when will I give it to Him?  He has already accepted it, He has already died for it, but have I let it go and actually given it to Him by accepting His forgiveness?

Have I become comfortable wallowing in my sin, remembering it, begging forgiveness and then returning to wallow in the comfort  of being an unforgiven sinner yet again?  I am not sure…. maybe?  I am not saying that we shouldn’t be praying for and begging for forgiveness often and more than once, but I think I have been missing a very crucial part to this prayer, a prayer asking Jesus to help me release my sin, give it to Him and enter the unknown territory of forgiven sinner by accepting His forgiveness.

Sweet Lord, sweet Savior, sweet Jesus I am in awe as I see Your amazing work more clearly than ever before through more specific and focused prayers.  I want each beat of my heart to be filled with gratitude and thanksgiving for You and I beg You to please keep opening our eyes to our sins so that we can beg forgiveness, repent and release our sin to You!

The Ancient Paths

Just as impurities should be removed from the original metals during the process of making an alloy to increase the strength and durability of the alloy (the new metal), our impurities should be cleansed and removed before He melts our hearts into one new heart through marriage.

If our hearts are full of impurities, then how can we ever hope for our new heart to be strong.  These impurities will cause our new heart to be brittle, weak, and easily damaged requiring constant attention and surgical repair.

Sweet Lord, we have neglected the need to seek cleansing and purification through reflection, prayer, fasting and confession before the many celebrations of our lives, but most of all before our marriages.  We have turned the time of engagement and preparation into yet another party rather a time of reflection, prayer and a time to seek You.  Please forgive us and help us seek the ancient paths, where the good way lies.

Jeremiah 6:16
Thus says the Lord:  Stand at the crossroads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way lies; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls.

Tonight as He bleeds…

On this night our Lord will pray in the garden of Gethsemane, suffering in agony as He prays to the point of sweating blood.

What was flashing through His mind in those moments?  What caused Him such great emotional pain  that He physically sweat blood?

Maybe as He knelt there praying, life flashed before His eyes, but instead of seeing His own life, He saw all of our lives flash before His eyes. Our lives became His as He lived each of our lives in His mind, in those moments.  He saw every sin each of us has ever committed as His own sin.

He watched Himself committing these grievous, selfish, terrible and sinful acts. God, His Father, watched Him committing these grievous, selfish, terrible, and sinful acts.

He literally, physically, emotionally, and mentally bore our sins, and yes, I believe watching Himself commit our sins made Him sweat blood.

He Himself bore our sins… – Peter 2:24

Oh my Jesus…  please forgive us, thank You, please forgive us, thank You, please forgive us, thank You, thank You, thank You…

Missing You…

My friends, I am not sure why but I have been distracted lately.  Jesus hasn’t been at the forefront of my thoughts, instead I have been busy, running around, and missing Him.  We took a yoga class together last night, and usually when He joins me He is helping me through, but last night in my imagination He was sitting there watching me (smiling, but still just watching).  For some reason I have put Him aside instead of welcoming Him in?

As I miss Him, I am thankful for my previous posts that remind me that He is still here watching and waiting for me to call to Him again.

Please pray for me my friends, as you bask in His loving presence, that the veil covering me will be removed yet again, my eyes will be cleansed yet again, and again I will see only Him everywhere and in everyone!

Thy Kingdom Come, Thy Will Be Done!