Just as impurities should be removed from the original metals during the process of making an alloy to increase the strength and durability of the alloy (the new metal), our impurities should be cleansed and removed before He melts our hearts into one new heart through marriage.
If our hearts are full of impurities, then how can we ever hope for our new heart to be strong. These impurities will cause our new heart to be brittle, weak, and easily damaged requiring constant attention and surgical repair.
Sweet Lord, we have neglected the need to seek cleansing and purification through reflection, prayer, fasting and confession before the many celebrations of our lives, but most of all before our marriages. We have turned the time of engagement and preparation into yet another party rather a time of reflection, prayer and a time to seek You. Please forgive us and help us seek the ancient paths, where the good way lies.
Thus says the Lord: Stand at the crossroads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way lies; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls.
Twelve years ago my husband and I were married, we became one, but I don’t think I ever took it as seriously as God meant for it to be taken. Yes, we have been married and faithful and loving. We have been blessed with three wonderful children, and we spend lots of time together, but I don’t think I have really believed or thought that we are truly and physically one.
And the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two but one flesh.
A few months ago, I started thinking about this bible verse and wondered if truly we were truly made into one and given the same heart on that wonderful day of our marriage. Have I ever behaved as if we truly have one heart? Have I inflicted damage or scars on our heart through hurtful words, arguments and fights? Have I ever tried to pull or push away hard enough to create a rip in our heart or to break our heart? Has God ever had to carefully sew our new heart back together? Has our heart grown stronger throughout the years or have we inflicted scars that will forever be weak spots that might break more easily?
I don’t know the answers, but after I started thinking about this I began trying to literally, physically and spiritually live life as one with my husband. I began by talking with him in my heart and praying for him throughout the day while he is as work. During yoga classes I started praying that the strength, flexibility and peace gained in class were flowing to him. Talking, laughing and doing homework with our children after school, I began praying that he was sharing in our time together. Finally when I mess up which is often, I beg forgiveness from him and from our Lord (this one isn’t new), but now when he messes up I beg forgiveness from our Lord because if I truly believe that we are one then my mistakes are still mine, but his mistakes are now mine too.
Most of you reading this probably think I am a little crazy and spend way too much time in my own head. I will never really know the answers, but I don’t think that is really the point. From my little experiment I do know that I see my husband more and I love him more.
I pray that it is true, I pray that our sweet Lord truly gave us one heart, our heart!